Station 11 – Sometimes, you need to break out of your shell a little bit

Jason Castro should be out of the competition already.  Branded by Vote For The Worst as the ‘stoned’ for manifesting marijuana-linked and intoxicated gestures and looks on stage, Jason should do away with the irksome stunts. He flaunts his dreadlocks like rolls of tobacco and never takes risks. He sticks with his good-boy falsettos (and don’t forget the shivering bizarre eyes intentionally constricted into a fine line) and never breaks out of his shell. He’s as boring as Archuleta but Archuleta has a wide fan-base that just force themselves to love him (because they just did from the start and it kinda kills pride to shift allegiance) even though he gets more boring and boring day by day.

I think he should try to break out a little Jason Mraz right there if he can make through to next week. Although the chances for that would be very low because Syesha’s curse (dumping everyone she’s with in the bottom 2) might never be counter-spelled by the fumes of Jason’s dreadlocks. Besides, Simon has insulted him by saying “That was utterly atrocious. It was like a first round audition massacre” for the Jason’s rendition of I Shot the Sheriff and a self-esteem-drowning “Jason. I’d pack your suitcase!” Pack your suitcase? That is like telling “I don’t wanna waste my time scrutinizing your useless performance!” Simon is really rude but looking at Jason’s weak performance in the Rock n’ Roll night, I don’t think he would go really far. He should wrap his ukulele and return to Rockwall, Texas.

Of course, David Cook proves again the rocker in him and he perfectly stood out. Archuleta is the same boring balladeer while Syesha was kinda good in the zone but is already learning from the tear-factory Brooke White.  Will America pity her? But she’s way better than Jason so I think she might be saved. For the nth time in the bottom, America would be absolutely acquainted with her and probably vote for her until the next season. 

Excavating youtube for replays,
PC

Station 10 – If you make out, make sure it’s not along the highway

The pages of the book of secrets are already starting to uncover and the leaves fly one by one out of the book. If you haven’t seen the latest episode of GG then I warn you not to continue further because the issues in the latest episode are very grave and the revelations are too shock-inducing. At least, for me, that is.

Eric and Asher. They started at the Ostroff center, now they are so comfortable lip-locking on the highway shores of New York. The lesson? There is always a public bathroom to accommodate the pleasures. Oh my. Bad example. What I meant was, the nearest hotel when you are anywhere in New York is inches away. Are the urges that unrestrainable? Well, good thing we now know that Jenny has a Midas touch on the men (or boys) she dates. That is, her touch makes anyone gay. I wonder how often Dan and Rufus gulp the antidotes.

Serena’s Threesome Scandal. The moans came from G and S while they were filming an erotic indie storyline-less fit-on-online-porn-sites threesome action. Of course, it shouldn’t be flashed on public TV without the blurring pixels on the private parts. The thing is, when Serena finally became good the evil started to haunt her. Well, it goes with some reality though. And hopefully bestfriend B can do something with it by mustering all the bitchness in the world and screw that G or the venom that she spits. The lesson here is that vanity is a bad thing. As vague as that. No, I mean, why film all the nude act when you can do it anytime you want?

Serena’s Murder. Oh yes. She whispers to B the untold story of why she left NY and settled for some other random american state. Probably the guy with them on the video? The plot is thickening and we would eventually witness that in the next few episodes which unstoppably hauls me up to now like a cheesy junkfood.

So basically that’s it. You don’t have to show some immorality to be Prince-ish. I can do that whole thing under the sheets. Not on the sturdy bench in the park. That would be uncomfy.

Starting to get more mature,
PC

Station 9 – What if you just found out your favorite actor has a band?

What the buck? Ed Westwick has a band. I couldn’t actually believe it. His indie band The Filthy Youth was hardcore hot. Although honestly, it was a mediocre indie rock band and their music sounds like any upbeat invention of emo rock bands along the street (which you cannot really decipher what the lyrics meant at first because they sound like random words put together) but hey, that is just for now. I know Ed would go really far. Princes start as simple kids in the first place. The songs though are really creative (sang with, of course, Ed’s very particular accent) especially Boy Don’t Smoke which talks about… I’m sorry I have to be British to understand and my ears are so slow in capturing the words. Hush. If only rock were a little slow. Justhear it for yourself. Your effort will be priceless. Haha.

The band is composed of Ed Westwick, of course as lyricist and vocalist, Benjamin Lewis (who looks like someone who just gulped a handful of heroin which makes me think that Ed might not be in good hands or he’s just keeping up with the filthy youth name) on guitar, some Jimmy on another guitar, Tom Bastiani on bass, and finally John Vooght (who looks relatively clean but didn’t pay much attention to his low resolution cropped profile photo on his myspace page) on drums. Looking at his bandmates, I think Ed’s going to be solo before their debut on iTunes (if it happens). It may, if they actually change the name as a good start. Ed Westwick > Filthy, so please, but I think it’s too late to change their well-published-on-networking-sites-and-forums band name.

Man, Ed Westwick really rock and I pray and wish that his band will succeed although its current success has been just driven by Ed’s popularity in the Gossip Girl series. But they’ve got a little talent and it’s worth some praise. Uhm, did I just type that? Kidding. But seriously, they have a great future ahead of them. Kudos to The Filthy Youth!

Starting to build The Clean Youth,
PC

Station 8 – Anticipation Tingles

Gossip Girl will be out for another episode this Monday and I believe it’s the most teasing (currently) as the promos have ignited some bombs. I was totally intrigued. The first promo that I saw flashed Blair (Leighton Meester, shown on the right really upset) crashing through Jenny’s (Taylor Momsen) party (that I think would be thrown for her by Asher (Jesse Swenson), Jenny’s “King” because the poor social climber [Jenny] cannot even afford a bottle of high-class wine). And yeah, Blair crashes and shows her posh phone and she was like “Where’s the host? I have something for him.” So what will she show Asher? Some porn video featuring the hunk? We have until Monday to cure our curiosity. The clues are revealed in the promos in increments that will pull a lot of viewers due to the web of possibilities they reveal. Like in the second promo I watched, I saw Serena (Blake Lively) watching a video in her crimson laptop with some moans overheard. Is that what’s inside Blair’s phone? Or was it a completely different issue for Serena that’s under the dark skirts of Georgina (Michelle Trachtenberg)?

I am so excited to watch episode 16 which is I think subtitled “All About My Brother” which leaves only Eric (Connor Paolo) and Dan (Penn Badgley) on the spotlight. But who’s gonna steal the limelight on the show? I think it’s Eric with Asher. I have this gut feel. Hazel (Oh yeah, she has a significant line for the first time and I don’t really care who plays the role) spoke in the promos, with her rude accent, “It’s kind of hard to party when the GAY BOMB drops!” So I was like, (lamp lights over the head) “Asher and Eric?” Hope the rumors are true because if the hideous homo role goes to Chuck (Ed Westwick), I would totally abandon Gossip Girl. Blair and Chuck should be the pair of the happily ever after. And I don’t care if it goes to Nate, played by Chace Crawford, (which is most unlikely) but I hope it would to add some spice in his monotonous emo character.

Yeah. And I have this thing for a pastime. Sometimes, anticipation has grueling yet satisfying effects. The thrill and shivers and heart-pounding minutes before the revelations feel so good. I dunno. Are princes ought to feel the same way?

Waiting for the next online stream of GG,
PC

Station 7 – Learn from the cheese – Be optimistic

The tweenies are back for the last installment of their worldwide Disney hit High School Musical, now subtitled “Senior Year”. Awww… that would be awwww-ful. I mean, the awwww pity-for-puppies expression. Whatever. Anyway, Zanessa is back and we’ll once again sigh at their melting, cheesy love story. Tisdale is back with her new nose and hopefully that would scratch Sharpay’s irksome voice (that I always wish would ‘tone down’ because I don’t wanna hear another Britney-ish stuff. It’s deafening.) But I think it’s tolerable to hear Tisdale’s version of Fabulous than make, say, Jillian Hall dub it for her. Monique Coleman will slam her with her burger cheeks if that happens. To the right is their promotional poster and as usual, Sharpay is still lost. But, who knows they might add some fantasy to the trilogy and curse Sharpay with the mermaid spell?

Shown below, on the other hand, is the vid of their first Press Conference (Friday, Salt Lake, Utah where they’ve done most of the shoot) for their supposedly hottie movie that would haul tweenies to pull their mother’s skirt for another Zanessa flirting moment. But hey, where’s idol Ryan? No, not Seacrest. Sharpay’s brother a.k.a pet was not in the press con. Lucas might have been killed or has his nose chiseled as well to match his sister.

And speaking of flirty Hudgens, I think she’s having a new life now that she kinda graduated from the whole high school-ish stuff. Growing more mature? What was that around 3:40-3:50 where she was asked to comment about Miley’s Vanity Fair Photos? (At least, Miley’s was covered with a silk blanket while Hudgen’s was all out with unshaved… Oh no, I’m not going to go deeper into that). I knew it flamed a lot of bad memories in her brain but she smartly neglected it. With the I-hate-you-for-asking-that-I-might-bite-you-with-my-sharp-fangs look of hers, of course.

Anyway, I hope their new songs would be LSS-ing still and less cheesier than the first ones. And upbeat perhaps? I don’t wanna sleep with Nananana again. Oh puhleezzz!!! But then, I admit, I still feel the tickles in this very superficial childish movie. The thing is, I’m always reminded of happily ever afters, prince charming and princess kind of stuff. Disney always makes me feel optimistic. Yay. I can’t wait to hear Tisdale’s new nightingale. (Pukes).

Urging some brain activity.
PC

Station 6 – Unconscious Joke-Cracking is a No in Public

Brooke White is out on idol but that wasn’t the shock that shook the recent eliminations. It was expected of Brooke in the first place after she made I’m a Believer a drunken man’s hit. I can still hear her hoarse voice. Anyway, as I’ve said she’s not the spark on the idol elimination but Abdul’s crackdown. What was inside her coke cup? Three things – alcohol, hallucinogens, and cannabis.

Well, idol was a bit swift with the chatty stuff because the contestants would each sing two songs for the night. The producers thought it would be convenient to have first, a rundown of everyone’s first song and the judges would concisely comment on each afterwards. Paula, who just gulped her metamphetamine, commented two songs by Jason Castro but Jason had just sung once. Randy has to intervene because if he didn’t Paula might climb on her table and insult Brooke White with all the bad words she can muster after the poor singer gave a her a pretty hard time looking for euphemisms last week. But it was pure entertainment nonetheless to break some ice in the boring Neil Diamond Week. Paula should never forget her sedatives unless she wants to spoil more Idol secrets, such as the scripted comments perhaps?

Anyway, since Paula cannot be axed from idol (well they should after that breakdown), Brooke White was sent home with her piano. Say hello to your cutesy babies again Brooke. The nanny’s fantasies are over.

So next time, I’ll make sure I’m not gonna be a butt of jokes on stage. Because that would entirely soil my charming reputation.

LMAO,
PC

Station 5 – The cute princes get the X factor

Sadly, if I were to go on stage with someone like Charlie Green, I will be neglected. Cute and smart-looking kiddie crooners will steal the spotlight. I haven’t liked kids and brats since I was born until Charlie came and wowed me. Oh my. Not all kiddos are really mischievous-looking crafty cry babies. Charlie Green is the next kid to beat in Britain’s Got Talent. He’s half-British, half-Filipino, plays the piano and he looks really cute I wanna squeeze him and squish him with a tight hug. His audition piece is Frank Sinatra’s Summer Wind. He started singing at 3 and now this oldie-song-fan ten-year old kid just tickled the Briton’s asses to give him a standing ovation during his live audition. And Simon was like “ay thaink youwr a litowl stawr!” Hopefully he won’t grow up like boring Fetus Archuleta although I have a feeling he will travel that road less traveled by. We aren’t sure, by the way.

Here is his rendition of Summer Wind:

My. I wanna spank my parents for not pushing me into this field. I shouldn’t go into this Prince Charming training if I started out as a prince in the first place. Oh Charlie.

Still stuck in wonderland,
PC

Station 4 – Believe in Serendipity

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I was bored this afternoon and I looked for some online quiz to squeeze out some mental alertness (because I was done watching David Cook’s performance for the nth time in Neil Diamond week) but I end up quizilla-ing and scavenged for American-idol related stuff. Then, I came aboard the which-American-idol-are-you quiz. And guess what? I just found out that I have a lot of common things with my idol. Promise, I didn’t even bothered to cheat with his americanidol.com bio.

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Here is the result:

Which American Idol are you most like?(2008)

You are David Cook!(WOO! He’s my fav! lol) Well, your sort of a nerd, but you like being a nerd. Your a lot of fun and like making your friends laugh. However you tend to enjoy your you time like watching TV or playing with your guitar. You try to be as easy-going as possible. You also have a great sense of humor.You’d be great freinds with: Michael JohnsYour color is: GreenYou love: Fast foodYou’d fall for a guy or girl who:Is a huge dork like you, loves to have fun, would watch hours of TV with you
Take this quiz!

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Of course it should be David Cook. And I dub it ‘fateful’ because I wasn’t impish enough to take it again so that I would get what I like. I was honest, I took it once – the very reason I was so proud to publish this. Nyahaha.

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Anyway, David Cook’s performance last night was fantastic as he smartly arranged Neil Diamond’s I’m Alive and All I Really Need is You to suit contemporary taste. He’s a true rocker and I have a feeling he will kick now voiceless Jordin Sparks out of the limelight.

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The worst of the night was Brooke White’s I’m a Believer. Come on! Shrek’s was in heaven, Brooke’s was 75 miles below hell – very low, coarse, upbeat but lifeless. And for the very few times in my life, I have to agree with rude Simon, “It was a NIGHTMARE!” So when I saw her face, I’m a believer of her downfall right there! But I care less now about the all-American nanny. I’m just attached due to her cool Let it Be version but she’s so inconsistent I wanna put all of my attention to idol’s Prince Charming David Cook where I will get some tips to be the ultimate Prince Charming. And I know I’ll rub elbows with him someday. Yeah. Serendipity tells me so and I have that quiz result as a mad foreshadow.

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Dreaming still,
PC

Station 3 – Dream of the right princess

Princesses are just surfacing out one by one and you have to be a little fastidious in choosing your dream girl. Make sure she can do something like present Angelina Jolie or looks like her nonetheless. Although it would be really a hard task because (1) you have to discern whether you’re going to stick with the stereotypical Disney elegant maiden (who knows how to chant a nightingale like Cinderella or Belle) or break out a little bit with Paris Hilton-ish girls and (2) the good girl can only be granted by fate and prayers, as of now, why avoid wishing for the train-wrecks of the princess population?

Miley Cyrus – I’m sick of this girl. She’s always on the headlines even though she just strikes a peace-sign. Like peace is granted for pricking the air with your two fingers? I don’t really watch Hannah Montana because I was turned off when I tried. Her voice is excruciatingly eardrum-breaking! It is very irksome next to that sticky sound of crumpled balloon and metal on metal. This girl really needs more voice lessons from Dad. Sold out concerts? It’s because she gives hope to 67% of the population who do not have good voice. Now she’s pretty popping up in Vanity Fair magazine with only a blanket and people made a noisy buzz out of it. Hello… it wasn’t at all sexy. It was like anorexic 10 year old girl suffering from a fatal disease! So never hope for this girl. She won’t exactly match the Princess Identity.

Jillian Hall – If there’s another source of sexy sultry to-be Princesses on cam, that would be WWE Women’s Wrestling. But have you heard of this hilarious Britney minion on Raw? Yeah. Jillian Hall is her name and I know I must not pay much attention to her because she’s not really worth it. She’s there for wrestling but all she does is sing with her platinum voice (like the metal platinum is really stuck in her throat). The worse thing is that she imitates Britney but Britney is more tolerable because she goes out with her edited lip-synch minus one. But Jillian? Off key, screechy, corny joke time, [insert all insulting words here]. And definitely, she should be out of the entourage. Please.

Olsen Twins – Enough said. I’d rather stick with the Simpsons. Well that is if only four of them remain as women of the world.

Now it gets even harder to dream of the right Princess because the list has been trimmed. But the thing is, it was trimmed for the better. I love it. Now I just have to deal with 100 more – Megan Fox, Leighton Meester, Scarlett Johansson (Check out her Vid!), Natalie Portman, Penelope Cruz, [insert other FHM’s 100 sexiest women here], etc. It’s such an arduous task to be a Prince. Just give me the glass slippers, okay?

Now slipping in the snug blanket,
PC

Station 2 – Mr. Goodie won’t always work

Probably, a conservative society would call for it and you’ll shine at that but being the pure unblemished banana on stage doesn’t really mean securing a way to stardom. You need to peel some skin. We’re long done with medieval guys. If the audience would be grannies and mommies and their naughty girly rascal daughters, it might give you a smile and the I-have-gazillions-of-fans confidence. But shame on you as well. You’re attracting the weird side of the population. And you probably have the slight idea who the best prototype would be.

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Yeah. It’s David a.k.a Fetus Archuleta (as dlisted would put it). No doubt, this guy has the voice and the appeal but he has to do something sexy or he’ll be stuck with his grandma and preteens fans forever (uhm, he’s 12-yr old photo on Star Search is appropriately posted. Haha). This golly-gee-those-pre-menstrual-girls-scream-my-name smile award winner doesn’t have to play all-innocent at all. It bores me seeing him standing there like a statue on Idol stage, closing his semi-cross-eyed ocular device every now and then and licking his lips every after a song line. Why not try to pop those hips a bit and rock it out like the other David? And the annoying smile that locks his shoulders and makes him shiver like hey-I-am-so-cute is sooooo irritating. He seems to be like the jester you hammer in the arcade. Poor boy. He stays because the grannies and kiddos have all the time in the world. Not because he really rocks!

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However, it is not always a plus for Fetus to run a Britney (although generation-mate Miley Cyrus has bawled to every newbie to shed some skin in his vanity fair photo and see, she’s stealing the headlines!). Of course, it would mean something to preserve a certain virgin side of you but it doesn’t mean that if you appear ‘mean’, ‘cool’ and ‘sexy’ on cam, you’re not virgin. You can always conceal that secret with the right persona. We can reinvent ourselves, by the way. But to reinvent in the entirely Mr. Goodie-I’m-sinless dude type of personality won’t really be a long-term benefit for to-be Prince Charmings like me. It might secure you a place in the church ministry though. (*Laughs*)

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Moving on with the daydreaming,

PC